"The trend of labeling women “crazy” is part of the culture that socializes women to go along to get along. When women are told over and over again that they’re not allowed to feel the way they feel and that they’re being “unreasonable” or “oversensitive”, they’re conditioned to not trust their own emotions. Their behavior – being assertive, even demanding or standing up for how they feel – becomes an “inconvenience” to men and they’re taught not to give offense and to consider the feelings of others before their own."

On Labeling Women “Crazy” | Paging Dr. NerdLove - Part 2 (via brutereason)

(via seananmcguire)

"My mistrust [of men] is not, as one might expect, primarily a result of the violent acts done on my body, nor the vicious humiliations done to my dignity. It is, instead, born of the multitude of mundane betrayals that mark my every relationship with a man—the casual rape joke, the use of a female slur, the careless demonization of the feminine in everyday conversation, the accusations of overreaction, the eye rolling and exasperated sighs in response to polite requests to please not use misogynist epithets in my presence."

(via nadiaaboulhosn)

#i have a hard time dating men because i have a hard time believing men respect me

(via underwaternow)

Pretty much. 

(via fuckingrapeculture)

(Source: shakesville.com, via war-on-women-is-real)

"Being born a woman is an awful tragedy. Yes, my consuming desire to mingle with road crews, sailors and soldiers, bar room regulars—to be a part of a scene, anonymous, listening, recording—all is spoiled by the fact that I am a girl, a female always in danger of assault and battery. My consuming interest in men and their lives is often misconstrued as a desire to seduce them, or as an invitation to intimacy. Yet, God, I want to talk to everybody I can as deeply as I can. I want to be able to sleep in an open field, to travel west, to walk freely at night."

Sylvia Plath

fuck every single time that last line gets quoted without the rest

(via sadjailbait)

(Source: raccoonwounds, via flamingculture)

guiltyhipster:

Girls get mocked for liking high heels and lipstick. Girls get mocked for liking sports. Girls get mocked for liking tea and books. Girls get mocked for liking comics books and video games. Girls get mocked for liking math and science. Girls get mocked for liking boys. Girls get mocked for liking girls. Girls get mocked for liking both. What the fuck are we supposed to like? Water? Air? Come on, tell me. I’m dying to know. 

(via flamingculture)

"These are forms of male aggression that only women see. But even when men are afforded a front seat to harassment, they don’t always have the correct vantage point for recognizing the subtlety of its operation. Four years before the murders, I was sitting in a bar in Washington, D.C. with a male friend. Another young woman was alone at the bar when an older man scooted next to her. He was aggressive, wasted, and sitting too close, but she smiled curtly at his ramblings and laughed softly at his jokes as she patiently downed her drink. ‘Why is she humoring him?’ my friend asked me. ‘You would never do that.’ I was too embarrassed to say: ‘Because he looks scary’ and ‘I do it all the time.’

Women who have experienced this can recognize that placating these men is a rational choice, a form of self-defense to protect against setting off an aggressor. But to male bystanders, it often looks like a warm welcome, and that helps to shift blame in the public eye from the harasser and onto his target, who’s failed to respond with the type of masculine bravado that men more easily recognize."

Why it’s so hard for men to see misogyny (via ethiopienne)

BOOOM.  Read this if you are a dude, please.

(via geekyjessica)

Yesssssss.

(via quothtehblackbirdnevermoar)

Its hard for men to understand why women dont get loud & angry because they havent spent their entire lives being reprimanded whenever they take up too much space. (via pluralfloral)

(via bematthe)

"And this gets to the root of the fear, right here. When you walk around in the world as a woman, you get this creepy feeling oftentimes that men really do just think of you as a thing, an object, as meat. You’re just there to fuck, or to hang out with so he can get status from other guys. You see these images of how women who are valued are supposed to look, and you see that you don’t look that way, and you wonder if that means you have no value. You get the feeling that you could be a Pulitzer Prize winning astronaut billionaire who cured cancer, and you’d still have a bunch of guys trolling your comments saying, fuck you, I’ll just rape you, and what will you be then, bitch? Because sexual violence is how you control women, how you put them in their place, how you maintain your own dominance. For the guy in this film to actually say it out loud, to give voice to that terrible fear that so many of us have, was actually kind of cathartic for me. “You’re no different than that thing in the cellar.”"

“You’re No Different Than That Thing in the Cellar”: Thoughts on “The Woman” | Kameron Hurley
Spoilers for “The Woman” which I haven’t seen, but interesting…

I also still disagree with her in regard to The Cabin in the Woods, still, very interesting blog.

(via ecnef)

(via ecnef)

"This is the reality of sexism. This is what sucks about our culture. Living with daily sexual harassment on my fifteen minute walk to work eroded my sense of security and impacted every decision I made: don’t wear makeup, don’t wear knee boots even over jeans, don’t wear a skirt or a dress, don’t have your cellphone out but keep in at least one ear-bud so that you have an excuse to ignore comments, always hold your keys, glance behind you every few seconds, learn which blocks are safe and which aren’t, don’t go out after dark, take the BART but stay toward the center of the platform where there are the most people, don’t my eye-contact, don’t make eye-contact, don’t ever make eye-contact and maybe this will protect you but probably not. With this constant self-policing I forgot who I was, too busy trying not to be noticed."

— I have a lot of feelings about sexual harassment and my time in Berkeley.  (via mslonelyhearts)

(via thefeministpress)

"

Men want what they want.

So much of our culture caters to giving men what they want. A high school student invites model Kate Upton to attend his prom, and he’s congratulated for his audacity. A male fan at a Beyoncé concert reaches up to the stage to slap her ass because her ass is there, her ass is magnificent, and he wants to feel it. The science fiction fandom community is once again having a heated discussion, across the Internet, about the ongoing problem of sexual harassment at conventions — countless women are telling all manner of stories about how, without their consent, they are groped, ogled, lured into hotel rooms under false pretenses, physically lifted off the ground, and more.

But men want what they want. We should all lighten up.

It’s hard not to feel humorless as a woman and a feminist, to recognize misogyny in so many forms, some great and some small, and know you’re not imagining things. It’s hard to be told to lighten up because if you lighten up any more, you’re going to float the fuck away. The problem is not that one of these things is happening, it’s that they are all happening, concurrently and constantly.

These are just songs. They are just jokes. They are just movies. It’s just a hug. They’re just breasts. Smile, you’re beautiful. Can’t a man pay you a compliment? In truth, this is all a symptom of a much more virulent cultural sickness — one where women exist to satisfy the whims of men, one where a woman’s worth is consistently diminished or entirely ignored.

"

What Men Want, America Delivers - from the inimitable Roxane Gay (via jessicavalenti)

"When people of colour are expected to educate white people as to their humanity, when women are expected to educate men, lesbians and gay men are expected to educate the heterosexual world, the oppressors maintain their position and evade their responsibility for their own actions."

— Audre Lorde. (via theblacksophisticate)

(Source: , via poetryasillumination)

"The danger lies in ranking the oppressions. The danger lies in failing to acknowledge the specificity of the oppression. The danger lies in attempting to deal with oppression purely from a theoretical base. Without an emotional, heartfelt grappling with the source of our own oppression, without naming the enemy within ourselves and outside of us, no authentic, non-hierarchical connection among oppressed groups can take place."

— Cherrie Moraga, from “La Guera,” This Bridge Called My Back (1981)

(Source: bellemaddox, via bematthe)

"The stereotype of the ugly, unfuckable feminist exists for a reason – because it’s still the last, best line of defence against any woman who is a little too loud, a little too political. Just tell her that if she goes on as she is, nobody will love her. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’ve always believed that part of the point of feminist politics – part of the point of any sort of radical politics – is that some principles are more important than being universally adored, particularly by the sort of men who would prefer women to smile quietly and grow our hair out."

If you’re a feminist you’ll be called a man-hater. You don’t need rebranding  (via sailorfemme)

(Source: nathanjurgenson, via thepersonalispolitic)

"The trouble is that, for women, being “nice” often translates into putting up with things we should never put up with. How many times has some creep sat uncomfortably close to me on the bus and stared me down, yet I’m too afraid to just get up and move, lest I offend him?

We smile when we’re harassed on the street or hit on by jerks. We laugh at sexist jokes. We learn that when we have strong opinions, we’ll be called bitches and that if we get angry, we’ll be called hysterical. When we say what we want, we’re called pushy or aggressive.

Part of learning “ladylike” behavior is about learning to smile politely when someone is being crude. Femininity has long been attached to passivity and to being docile. Men fight, women giggle and fume silently."

— Women And Girls Don’t Need To Be Told To Be Nicer (via idioticteen)

(Source: brutereason, via rapeculturerealities)

"

Does your boyfriend or brother spend a lot of money on skin and hair care products? Does your dad spend much time at the hairdresser or beautician?

In your city’s daily paper do most of the political news items feature women? Are most of the stories in the business section written by and about women? Is there a special ‘Men’s Section’ filled with celebrity gossip, fashion and beauty tips?

When you watch a big sporting event on TV, are the athletes usually women? When you watch female sporting teams are there hot guys in tiny outfits cheering for them on the sidelines?

Do girls you know talk openly about getting off while watching porn? Do they boast about their sexual conquests?

When you’re at the food court, do your female friends happily gobble down a large burger and fries combo while your male friends pick at a salad and sip diet coke?

Do the majority of the fathers you know spend most of their time at home washing, cleaning, cooking and taking care of their kids? Do you often hear mothers refer to looking after their own kids as ‘babysitting’? Have you heard women talk about earning brownie points for cleaning their own house and washing their own clothes? Are you sick of men going on about how hard it is to balance work and parenthood?

Are your male friends afraid to walk on their own at night? Do they avoid drinking too much in case they get raped? Do they dress to protect themselves from attack and always carry their keys poking through their knuckles? When they complain about all this do your female friends shrug and tell them that’s just how the world is?

If the answer to all of these questions was yes, wouldn’t that mean something was wrong? Is that still true if the genders are reversed? Does it matter?

"

— Opening from Emily Maguire’s ‘Your Skirt’s Too Short: Sex, Power, Choice’  (via disabledbyculture)

(Source: gothipslikecinderella, via disabledbyculture)

"Why do men feel threatened by women?” I asked a male friend of mine. (I love that wonderful rhetorical device, “a male friend of mine.” It’s often used by female journalists when they want to say something particularly bitchy but don’t want to be held responsible for it themselves. It also lets people know that you do have male friends, that you aren’t one of those fire-breathing mythical monsters, The Radical Feminists, who walk around with little pairs of scissors and kick men in the shins if they open doors for you. “A male friend of mine” also gives—let us admit it—a certain weight to the opinions expressed.) So this male friend of mine, who does by the way exist, conveniently entered into the following dialogue. “I mean,” I said, “men are bigger, most of the time, they can run faster, strangle better, and they have on the average a lot more money and power.” “They’re afraid women will laugh at them,” he said. “Undercut their world view.” Then I asked some women students in a quickie poetry seminar I was giving, “Why do women feel threatened by men?” “They’re afraid of being killed,” they said."

Margaret Atwood, Second Words: Selected Critical Prose (1983), pg. 413.
(via bydbach)

You’ve probably heard the punchline before, but here’s the full context for the quote. (via muffinw)

(via wretchedoftheearth)

"One of the biggest misconceptions out there about sexual harassment is that it’s mostly intended as a kind of flirting, an attempt by the harasser to get positive attention and maybe even consensual sex. If you believe that, you’re much more likely to be hoodwinked by pro-harassment arguments about how innocent men are getting castigated, thrown out of conferences and bars, blocked on Twitter, etc. because they are either socially inept (Asperger’s is often trotted out as an excuse) or because “hypersensitive” bitches are freaking out because they love to “play the victim”. The reality is that harassment is usually about, well, harassing someone. It’s often disguised as flirting, but only so the harasser can (oh irony) play the part of the victimized innocent when his target pushes back. Disguising it as flirting also helps draw out the harassment, because the target often doesn’t want to be painted as “hypersensitive” and so she can be coerced with that into playing along and pretending she’s being flirted with when she and the harasser both know that he’s pushing her boundaries to get the pleasure of making her uncomfortable. Sometimes harassment is its own reward for harassers. Sometimes the harasser feels that he wouldn’t be able to have consensual flirting, much less sex, with the target anyway, so he’s pre-emptively punishing her for this hypothetical rejection. Sometimes, sadly, the harasser is a rapist and he’s trying to see if he can bully the victim with his “flirting” into being alone with him so he can rape her. But the point of harassment is not to get consensual interactions with women, and that myth needs to die already."

Sexual Harassment Is A Grassroots Political Movement | The Raw Story (via brute-reason)

(Source: brutereason, via zeeblebum)